My True Love Gave To Me: A Vacuum????

My Dad has wised up.

I remember seeing big wrapped boxes for my mom under the tree.

 Having Major Kid Wonder.

A Treasure had to be in a box that big, right? Well, sadly, inside that box with so much
Kid Potential was usually 

An Appliance.

A toaster oven, an iron, a cooking pot,

or a vacuum.

This all too frequent phenomenon is experienced every Christmas by all too many women.

And this must be stopped.

My Christmas card this year was inspired by this horrible trend.
I started with an image from
a wonderful book:
"Men's Adventure Magazines in Post War America".
I used Bernie Berlin's Never-Dull technique,
from my favorite how-to book
"Artist Trading Card Workshop."
That book is the shiznitz.
I neglected to scan the original image.my bad.
 I followed Bernie's instructions and got this:


Too Cool and Way Too Much Fun.
Next the search was on for the perfect vintage image...

This one is good....but not exactly what I had in my mind....too 70's...not old enuf..

Ah...now this is more like it....but maybe not perfect...

Eureka!! This one is perfect! OOPS!

I meant Hoover!!

This one has great text!

KATHY: SPOILER ALERT!!!

 STEP AWAY FROM THE COMPUTER!

The next steps involve

really FOUL language and

an over indulgence of alcohol.

Trying to teach yourself Photoshop

 is like being on a blind date.

 So many layers to learn, each one more frightening than the last...

This is not exactly what I pictured in my mind. But it can only go up from here.

teehee.

In Conclusion, this card is dedicated to all women all over the world who

have suffered the agony of opening

a wrapped appliance on Christmas Morn.

And my Mom?

Well, since my Dad wised up

she is sporting her favorite appliance of all!

Diamond Jewelry.

xoSusan

PS. Robin, from A Robin's Nest: I lost your address. Email me! I would like to send you a tardy card!!

Marsha: Thank you for your loverly card! I lost your address also and was having hives and shortness of breath over it. Thank God, you sent me your card, or I do believe I would be hospitalized right now.

Can't Wait To Catch Up.

You are my favorite Maker of Magic.

Kathy:

I told you to stop looking. You never listen to me. I don't know where your card is. It said some REALLY funny stuff in it. I mean like stand up comedian worthy. I hope you get it some day.

Cuz I think I peaked on that card.Love You.

teehee.

xoS